Sin and Retribution or not Come, Come Ye Saints

Friday, August 24, 2007
Vernal, Utah






Today was not so lovely. As I suspected, getting out of Provo proved to be a greater problem than either Miss Julia of the NavSys or myself was prepared to handle. Miss Julia insisted I go one way--over a 10,000+foot pass or my way which was to head south and go out through Deschenes. I drove the Minnie through Provo and past BYU so many times I was nearly ready to enroll! Even when I lost my temper for the 2nd time that morning and called her the Hillery word Miss Julia kept that same voice she must have cultivated during her time at Hostage Negotiation School.
The drivers in Provo are simply reckless--indeed, one might say mad. They cut in front of you, turn in front of you at break-neck speeds and generally exhibit behaviors seldom seen north of the border. My first temper melt-down was almost as soon as I left the beautiful Lakeside campground. I needed gas and was pleased to see a Chevron station on the right side of the highway with easy in-easy get back on access. It wasn’t busy so I carefully negotiated the Minnie into a completely empty two-pump bay. Just as I was easing up to the most forward pump(the Minnie takes up the entire room that normally two cars could be using) this little blond tart in a small car rips into the station from the other direction and goes face to face with me! I was startled and then appalled! She saw me and just pushed her little puissant car in front of my pump! At that point I was prepared to be charitable and let her pump her gas in spite of regretful bad manners. After all, I was going to need about 55 gallons and I would be awhile.
Imagine my shock when the trollop jumped out of her car, tank top, bra straps showing and tight sweat pants with LETTERING across her buttocks, and disappeared into the mini-mart! I waited--and waited--and WAITED. Now I’m beginning to seethe a bit. After about 10 minutes out she pops with a large soda pop. Carefully ignoring me she plops down in the driver’s seat and turns and gives the soft drink TO A BABY IN THE REAR SEAT!!!. Unbelievable! She never did pump any gas--she could have easily pulled into the parking slots for store use only!
“Well,” I thought. “What nerve that little skank has! And the poor child--left by the “mom” or sitter and then handed a good-sized cola before 10:00am. But at least she’ll see the inconvenience she’s caused and finally move her car.” NO WAY! She pulls out comb and lipstick and flips down the visor to apply make-up. Here is where I lost it and here is where God noticed and marked it down for divine retribution later on in the day.
I laid on my horn and it was quite a blast at the airhead. I finally had her attention! Since my Minnie had been blocking the space between the pumps and the store she had difficulty figuring out what her next maneuver would have to be. Her poor little strained brain finally figured out she would have to back up--and this is where God really took notes. As she backed up I inched forward--rather like pushing a pile of sand up against a wall. At last I was even with the gas pump and she was on the sidewalk. I even pulled out my camera and pretended to take pictures of her and her license plate.

$90.00 later with the tank full I left the station only to butt heads with










Miss Julia over the best way to proceed to Vernal, Utah. Without going into all the stops to program and re-program and also to check real maps--not my forte--I was on my way. Alas, so were the construction crews. Nothing like driving between narrow lanes of orange cones for an hour or so to relax one behind the wheel. Finally we reached the top of the pass--7400’--and it was spectacular.
I pulled off to let Byrdie chase the ball while I took some photographs. Here I noticed how much my reduced lung capacity affected me. I could only walk a few steps and began to feel quite ill. Before putting Byrdie back in the rig, I had to comb out at least a dozen round stickery balls that had glommed onto the soft hair of each leg! Still, putting a happy face on the relatively deserted road and wonderful scenery we soldiered on. I had the windows down for the cool, mountain air and Byrdie was head-out, sniffing in as much as she could. Then it happened--she must have inhaled something or been bitten by a bee but all of a sudden she began coughing and gagging. And she couldn’t stop. I began to worry about her pacing and hacking so pulled over again. She had thrown up all over the quilt covering the couch! Gross. But--I was thankful I’d had the forethought to at least cover the couch. I cleaned up what I could and replaced the quilt with a much thinner beach towel. I also shoved half an Actifed down her throat and bathed her head with a cool cloth. Back in the Minnie, back on the road, some coughing and choking, but it seemed better. Uh-oh--too quiet. Stop again--no mean feat on these narrow roads with precipitously narrow shoulders. This time there was an even bigger mess! She had thrown up all over even more! Only this time she managed to miss the towel and get a throw pillow, a rug, the couch and parts of the towel. God indeed had my number for the mornings temper tantrums over Provo drivers!
I finally pulled into the Vernal KOA and headed straight to the Laundromat to do unpleasant washing and flop on the bed with a much-deserved G&T. I will provide photos only of the pleasant parts of today’s trip--Eight hours to go 117 miles!