Palm Update

While I was enjoying the "new fronding" of the Sego palms, I didn't realize that so many of the huge Queen Anne palms were slowly succumbing to a rot most foul. I just happened to look out my window at a Queen Anne in the back yard and wondered why the palm trunk seemed to be shrinking. Not just shrinking--the palm's 'waist' was disappearing on one side. Even closer inspection revealed that the normally brown trunk was now white! This was obviously not going to be good news for these palms.

First of all, palm trees are actually grass. Right. But that's what Mr. Tree Expert said. Of course I called a tree expert! We don't call our house Las Palmas for nothing! So I picked the tree expert with the most impressive letters after his name out of the phone book. Mr. Palm Tree Expert showed up the next day and rivaled any doctor for glum looks, scribbling notes, shaking his head and "tching tching."

The news was grim. The bad freeze we had last winter had seriously weakened the insides of the tall Queens. Then, to further seal their fate, the other person living here who shall remain nameless, called the first name in the phone book to have the Queens trimmed. These shameless, sadistic, incompetent trimmers of palms used SPIKES on their shoes to climb the trunks and shave them. The cruelty of it all. The neglect! But the holes left by the spiked shoes let malevolent microbes into the poor palms and many of them are headed for the palm chipper. If you look at the trunks closely, you can see the holes left by the palm assassins.

Mr. Palm Tree Expert didn't look at me quite like a person would look at an habitual child abuser but it was close. And the cost to have ONE Queen Anne palm removed(including stump)?? THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS EACH!!! (But, for you, such a deal--2 palms removed for $450.00.) Never mind that there are at least four of the Queens that need to be removed.

I grieve for these beautiful graceful plants. Some of them are over 50 feet high! We're doing triage on the palms to decide which ones come out first. Obviously the palms that are due to fall directly on my side of the bed are going to the big Palm Paradise in the sky first!

So, a word to all of you with palms--if someone shows up to trim your palms and they are wearing cilice footwear, send them packing.